I WAS ROCK HARD

Someone posted a truly awful story to the net. That was a bad idea. What follows is what I posted in response:

[My (Richh's) thoughts are in bold.]

I was rock hard. She kept going. I wanted to enter her. I wonder if. . . Why not? Why not indeed! There's only one way to tell! all right, *two* ways, but dammit where the hell am I gonna find a syringe *and* a Beta version of "Drop Dead Fred" at *this* hour?! I grabbed her wrists, and held them comfortably out to her sides at shoulder level. She tugged lightlyheck, who wouldn't?. I held her there. She looked up at me, fascinated. All right, perhaps that's too strong a word. Intruigued? Nah, still too strong. Interested? Nope. Nauseated? Bingo! I slid down to enter her. This makes sense, since at the moment I was in the bunk *over* hers.

As soon as my head entered her, she let out a gasp. Or was it a fart?! I sniff the air, fascinated. She breath became gasping.!!!!!!! She only did that when she was near! All right, let me see now, she breath only becomes gasping when she is near? I think I got it now. Wow. *I'll* say I slid into her, SAFE!! and backed off Shit, I missed the bag while rounding second. Shit shit shit!. Her body arched to follow me. She, of course, remained behind. ??!! I sat there. And can you blame me? She slid down so that only the tip was in. Then I pounded into her as hard as I could. Shudders wracked her body. Quick, slip a pencil under her tongue! Quick!! Her eyes were open, but did not see. My fingers type, but sentences do not I form. I pounded again, shudders issuing forth from her groin. Soon, her groin was putting together subjects *and* predicates and was forming complete sentences!. At first I was concerned about her groin's reliance on the subjunctive but hey, I think, groins?? Who can figger em? On the third poundwell, to be precise it was 3 pounds, two ounces, and the question was, "What's a henway?", she arched into me with a WHUMP Is *that* legal?. And again. I felt like I was going to pound right through her. I felt WHUMP! And heck, who hasn't felt WHUMP! at one time or another? Like I NEEDED to pound right through WHUMP her ??!!. Brooke squeaked out "I'm coming!"Or was it her more articulate groin? She was warm. Well, from all the WHUMP who wouldn't be? WHUMP! See? And tight and and. . .Oh! Yes! I know *I'd* be Yes after all that WHUMP!

I woke up to find her gazing at the ceiling, a blank look in her eye. well of course, silly, this is the eye that did not see And on and on and on...