[Opening shot of Father Richard Simon hunched over a desk covered with books in a dimly lit room.]
Voice-Over: "He was the greatest biblical scholar of the seventeenth century!"
[Cut to Jazzercise video with Richard Simmons leading a class doing jumping-jacks.]
Voice-Over: "And he has helped millions lose weight!"
[Cut to Buddhist temple with Father Richard Simon and Richard Simmons fighting a room full of plump monks.]
Voice-Over: "And together they travel through time and space to fight over-weight heretics!"
[Cut to Title screen.]
Voice-Over: "In SIMON & SIMMONS! Coming this fall, only on Fox."
-Thomas C hold my calls